Don’t Draw Lines In The Sand: Use Collaborative Divorce

The traditional legal process of divorce no longer meets the needs of most family members, assuming it ever did in the first place. Historically, one spouse would sue the other spouse for divorce.

That process is referred to as the adversarial process. Each party retained a lawyer who took control of the process on behalf of his or her client.

A traditional divorce today involves the filing of court papers (a Petition for Dissolution of Marriage), personally serving the responding party, who then files with the Court an Answer and Counterpetition. This is the traditional manner in which a divorce case begins, with the legal framing of the issues and the procedural process with the court managing and monitoring the process of the divorce case.

Posturing Begins

When the cooperation between the “sides” ceases. The parties are basically observers of the process, taking and obeying their lawyers’ advice, not having any control over the outcome.

Many clients are not at all pleased with the outcome and the aftermath of conflict which typically ensues. Many parties are shocked over the amount of fees and costs, even when a case is settled, as most cases generally are resolved at some point in the adversarial process.

Many clients are frustrated with the systemic delays, sometimes intentionally enhanced, and unsatisfactory answers from their attorneys when keeping them apprised of the status of their case. Frankly, every court case may involve many of the systemic flaws which can exist when using the court system. And, even worse, there is a huge risk taken when allowing a judge, who is a stranger to the family, to have absolute control over the matters raised.

What Other Options Are There For A Married Couple Considering The Reality Of Divorce?

Collaborative law offers a more humane process:

• Potentially less costs in terms of fees
• Less time in terms of duration of the process
• Less stress and inconvenience
• More discreet and private
• Focus on self-empowerment, being in control of decisions impacting the outcome

Collaborative law is a type of alternative dispute resolution process in which the parties and lawyers all agree and commit to focus on problem solving, not fighting. In order to reach a settlement in which:

• Both sides are comfortable.
• Both parties are in control of the outcome.
• Both parties and family members are allowed to be concerned with the continuation of established roots where desired.

What Is The Collaborative Divorce Process?

Attorney Sheldon E. Finman has dedicated over 25 years to guiding families through the collaborative divorce process. Our approach is rooted in empathy and understanding, focusing on preserving family bonds rather than tearing them apart. Here is how the collaborative divorce process unfolds:

1. Initial consultation: We begin with a meeting to understand your situation and discuss your goals for the divorce.
2. Signing the participation agreement: All parties commit to resolving issues outside of court, fostering a cooperative environment.
3. Information-gathering: We collect all necessary financial and personal information for informed decision-making.
4. Team meetings: The process moves forward with regular joint meetings.
5. Developing solutions: Together, we explore creative solutions that meet the needs of both parties and any children involved.
6. Finalizing the agreement: After reaching a final agreement, the attorneys document and submit it for court approval.

If the collaborative process does not lead to a resolution to all matters and a judge is required to rule on any contested matters, the lawyers must withdraw, requiring the parties to retain other lawyers. After engaging in numerous successful collaborative divorces, the rare collaborative divorce which was not fully resolved unfortunately, most often, resulted in a litigated outcome.

A Holistic Approach To Divorce

Collaborative divorce offers a holistic approach that prioritizes the well-being of everyone involved. For example, we make sure to gather a team that includes financial neutrals who provide unbiased financial advice and mental health professionals who support emotional well-being. This way, every aspect of your life receives consideration.

For high-asset clients, privacy is paramount. Collaborative law protects your personal and financial information, maintaining discretion throughout. By focusing on collaboration, we help preserve relationships and protect children’s mental health. It can help make the transition smoother for the entire family.

Frequently Asked Questions About Collaborative Divorce

How does the cost and timeline of collaborative divorce compare to a traditional court case?

A collaborative divorce is typically less expensive and significantly faster than a traditional Florida divorce. Married couples can use the collaborative divorce process to avoid lengthy court hearings, trial preparation and formal discovery processes.

While the typical divorce process can take over a year to resolve, many collaborative divorce cases are resolved in a few months. Attorney fees and court costs are also typically significantly less when family matters are resolved without litigation.

What specific professionals are included in the collaborative team approach?

The collaborative divorce process often takes a team of professionals to help couples resolve marital matters, and may include the following:

• A financial professional to analyze assets, debts and income and asset division.
• A neutral mental health professional who can help facilitate communications between couples and develop child-focused solutions.
• A collaborative divorce attorney for each spouse to protect their best interests.

Each collaborative divorce process is unique, and many professionals are not necessary for the process.

What happens if we are unable to reach a full agreement through the collaborative process?

An agreement may not be reached through the collaborative divorce process. When that happens, spouses may need to move forward with the divorce through traditional legal methods, including litigation. However, each partner’s collaborative divorce attorney must withdraw from the case, and new lawyers must be used.

The purpose of this is to both protect the confidentiality of the collaborative process and encourage all parties to stay committed to finding a cooperative solution.

How is our privacy and sensitive financial information protected during the process?

Privacy is preserved in the collaborative divorce process through binding participation agreements that require all sides to keep the information they learn, documents and the details of the negotiations confidential. The process is not public, and only the essential documents will usually be filed with the court. In addition, the participants can request that sensitive financial information be sealed to prevent public access.

Who ultimately makes the final decisions regarding our family’s future and the divorce agreement?

A judge makes the final decision during a traditional divorce. However, spouses make the final decisions during a collaborative divorce. This allows spouses to negotiate a tailor-made agreement that serves the best outcome for everyone.

Learn More Information From A Collaborative Divorce Lawyer

For more information about collaborative divorce, call us at Sheldon E. Finman, P.A., on 239-215-4952 or complete our contact form to schedule an initial consultation. Our law office is in Fort Myers, and we represent clients throughout Southwest Florida, including Cape Coral.