What does it mean when a couple grows apart?

The word divorce might make you think of arguments, anger and resentment. Indeed, our culture’s view of divorce indicates that it is usually one person’s fault, and it is a failure for both parties. Any mature adult who has mutually chosen to separate from a partner knows how untrue and unfortunate this common misconception is. The truth is, many spouses simply grow apart after they are married.

What does it mean when a couple “grows apart,” though? This phrase is vague, and it does not necessarily refer to any single experience or situation. Rather, this can describe a range of factors that lead to the end of a marriage. Here are three examples of what may happen when you grow apart:

Communication decreases

According to The Huffington Post, lack of communication is the leading cause of divorce in the United States. Indeed, many couples struggle to talk openly with their spouse about their feelings and concerns, and this problem can lead to growing apart over time. When you do not communicate with your partner, it creates a gap between you that will only widen with time.

Goals are different

You might have no problem communicating with your spouse but still find that you are growing apart from them. Another potential contributor may be a disparity between your goals and your spouse’s. When you married, you were likely on the same page about what you wanted and expected. Sometimes your needs change, though, and it may be difficult to reconcile this with your spouse’s needs.

Relationship becomes friendship

Keeping a marriage together is a juggling act. You have to make time for your partner and maintain the connection that brought you together in the first place. Sometimes couples get too busy or lose the motivation to do so, and a relationship can turn into a friendship. There is nothing wrong with this, but it may signal that divorce is the healthiest option for both parties.

FindLaw Network
The Florida Bar | Board Certified
Super Lawyers
Peer Review Rated For Ethical Standards & Legal Ability | AV Preeminent | Martindale-Hubbell from LexisNexis 2020
AFLP | Association of Family Law Professionals
Bar Register | Preeminent Lawyers | 2020 Martindale-Hubbell