The effect of divorce on your children can last for years. Minimizing the impact of your changing relationship on their well-being requires thoughtful decision-making.
Collaborative divorce can help you sustain a healthy and functional relationship with your ex. This allows your children the opportunity to develop and strengthen their own relationships with each of you without the debilitating risks of parental alienation.
Reinforce life skills
As a parent, you hope to instill values in your children that will enable them to live a successful life. Critical skills including emotional processing, resilience, collaboration, compromise, respect and teamwork can improve your children’s ability to get along well with others. Collaborative divorce is a way that you can teach and reinforce these valuable skills to your children through your example.
Your children will observe you putting differences aside and negotiating with your ex to identify solutions that benefit both parties. As they grow, they will recognize the self-control, humility and dignity it took to maintain a cordial relationship with someone who’s values no longer aligned with yours. This approach to settling your divorce can not only improve your children’s lives in the now, but can also improve their understanding of how to form and maintain meaningful relationships despite differences.
Set healthy boundaries
Even with a collaborative divorce, you need to set healthy boundaries with your ex. Clearly, your relationship is not the same as it once was and will require adjustments to make it continue to work. According to Psych Central, healthy boundaries enable you to articulate your expectations and allow your ex to do the same.